That using tampons could make you lose your virginity is a persistent myth. You only lose your virginity by having sex with a guy for the first time. By penile-vaginal intercourse, to be more precise. Not by using a tampon.
Unlike you might think, the hymen isn’t a membrane that covers the entrance of the vagina. It’s more like a collar of tissue attached to the vagina wall and it has an opening which allows menstrual blood to flow through. The tissue can stretch, which means that when you touch the hymen by inserting a tampon, it doesn’t necessarily tear. Especially not when using small tampons. The tampon will easily fit through the opening. It might stretch the hymen, but this doesn’t mean you aren’t a virgin anymore.
Even if the hymen tears when using a tampon – or because of any other reasons such as playing intensive sports or having a bad fall – of course you’re still a virgin. All girls and women who have never had sexual intercourse are called virgins; the state of their hymen has nothing to do with that. Let’s dispel another myth: not every woman bleeds the first time she has sex. Only about half of them do. It can also happen that you don’t bleed the first time, but do lose some blood the second time. When you’re tensed or your vagina is too dry, the friction of the penis sometimes creates small tears in your vagina wall which can bleed.
Blood is no proof of virginity
Whether you bleed or not during the first time you have sex: it doesn’t prove that you’re a virgin. This is troublesome in cultures that consider blood-stained sheets a proof of virginity. In these cases not bleeding can cause problems, like honour crimes or disownment. No wonder that women have come up with a whole assortment of tricks: from pills containing fake blood and little cuts in their fingers, to planning their menstruation by using the contraceptive pill. Some go even further and let a cosmetic surgeon reconstruct their hymen.